TRUCKSTOP - By Rich Tatarka

    DISCLAIMER! (The author of this article may have used words like “Biker” and “Eskimo” during the creation of said article. At no time were these words used in a derogatory way. Anyone offended by this author using those particular words has his deepest sympathies and hopes that one day you offended ones can find comfort and solace, and perhaps get a life...)  The AI Thingy that now possesses my typing software made me include this with my article. It also gave me a D+ grade for style and composition… Go figure… Now on to the Article…

     I used to like airplanes… now they’re nothing but a nuisance. Every day shortly after 5 AM departures and arrivals at “Bozeman Yellowstone International Airport” start. Southwest to Denver. United to Denver. Southwest to Vegas. American to Los Angeles. Then the Flying Eskimo to Portland. Followed by a couple of Deltas to Salt Lake and Minneapolis. And another Flying Eskimo to Seattle. (Alaska Airlines has an Eskimo painted on the tail of their jets. Although some say it’s Bob Marley, around here they’re known as the Flying Eskimos). And so, it continues like that until about midnight or so. On average around 120 flights arrive and depart Bozeman Airport a day. That’s just the commercial flights. There are countless private jets coming and going as well. And I live right under the flight path, so I get to experience them all. I’m also under the flight path of our local Life Flight Helicopter. On the straight line that he takes from his parking spot at the airport to the hospital he flies directly over me, or more precisely over that part of the roof between the wood stove chimney and the vent for the kitchen sink… And he is in the air a lot. Several of his trips aren’t medical related but rather transporting lost souls out of the mountains (where they don’t belong…) back to the asphalt (that they should’ve never left…) let me give you a brief “For Example” on the lost souls’ topic: Everyone knows where the College “M” is just east of Bozeman on the side of the Bridgers. A parking lot sits along the highway below the “M” and there is a trail that starts there and goes pretty much straight up to the “M". It is a real popular trail that attracts lots of people. Once or twice a month someone gets lost on that trail and calls 911 to come to find them. No. Really. Anyway, Back at the airport, a daily-all day long continuous drone of the flight school airplanes doing practice landings fills the air. Circle. Land. Take-off. Circle. Land. Take-off… Montana Air National Guard, and the constant flights of helicopters from Bozeman airport up to Yellowstone Club and back add to the constant noise. Then there’s those darned old noisy trains… several of those 24/7 and as they go thru Belgrade the horn gets used at each of the 6 crossings there. I live a good three miles from the tracks, and still the train horn is loud here… (One would think that a loud horn really isn’t necessary as the crossings have arms that come down, so cars don’t get crunched by the train). I guess the horn is to warn the stupid people who don’t quite have a firm grasp on the crossing guard concept perhaps…

     Moving on, I must tell you about another “Fun” thing we have now in the greater area of the Peoples Republic of Bozeman… We now have roving bands of bikers to contend with. And these are not the respectable Harley rider types, nor are they the scary “Man-Buns on Bikes” bunch that roam the streets of our fine city. These are on the type of bike that you must ride in the fetal position. These bikes can go from 0 to 150 mph in about 30 feet, and they are a pure joy to be around. (not really) You see these guys almost every evening and you can hear them racing around and you can tell from the sound they make they aren’t going the speed limit. Sadly, there’s nothing local law enforcement can do about them because nobody can catch them.

    Staying on the motorcycle theme for a bit, how is that new lane filtering for motorcycles law working for you? Had enough of it yet? (If you’re not familiar with this, it’s where motorcycles are allowed to ride up to the stoplight between the vehicles waiting for the light to change from red to green.) Around here they abuse the heck out of this law. They filter everywhere, not just at the red stop light. They also filter on both sides of you and at times are in your blind spot and you have no idea they are there. Montana is one of only 3 states where this filtering debacle is legal. (One of the other two is California… Of course…) I really wonder what the Montana Legislature was thinking when they passed the bill that made this a law… I’m quite certain that in the next legislative session we will see Safety Lobbyist Todhunter leading the charge to repeal this stupid law...

     That said, I must say that it’s good to be back in the old log truck finally. My second hip rebuilding procedure took a bit longer to heal and put me a bit behind schedule. But now I’m rolling again, and the phone has been ringing a lot and I’m certain that it won’t be long before I have more work than I can handle again.

     I must close now as I have to see if I can find my bow. I’ve drawn an archery antelope tag, and I haven’t seen it for a year or ten. I need to get practiced up and perhaps have another topic for the newsletter, which is entirely possible as once again I get to hunt with Safety Sneaker Todhunter...

Until next time, That is All.

Rich T.